pirates

Pirates are the chosen people of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Pirates were actually very kind, often giving candy to children. They had a really good reputation until the missionaries and Hare Krishnas spread corrupt stories about them.

The decline in pirates is the cause of global warming. Graphs like this conclusively prove it.

Please consider becoming a pirate or piratess*. Not only will you then be among the chosen people of the Flying Spaghetti Monster but planetary disaster will be avoided.

* Camelia is not yet cool with the word wench, but Kitt is working on her.